Terry Pratchett

«There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty.»

Terry Pratchett


«Destiny was funny stuff, he knew. You couldn’t trust it. Often you couldn’t even see it. Just when you knew you had it cornered, it turned out to be something else—coincidence, maybe, or providence. You barred the door against it, and it was standing behind you. Then just when you thought you had it nailed down it walked away with the hammer.»

Terry Pratchett


«Just because something is a metaphor doesn't mean it can't be real.»

Terry Pratchett


«It is true that words have power, and one of the things they are able to do is get out of someone’s mouth before the speaker has the chance to stop them.»

Terry Pratchett


«But, in truth, it had not exactly been gold, or even the promise of gold, but more like the fantasy of gold, the fairy dream that the gold is there, at the end of the rainbow, and will continue to be there forever - provided, naturally, that you don't go and look. This is known as finance.»

Terry Pratchett


«It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.»

Terry Pratchett


«The reaper does not listen to the harvest.»

Terry Pratchett


«Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.»

Terry Pratchett


«But this didn't»

Terry Pratchett


«There was no safety. There was no pride. All there was, was money. Everything became money, and money became everything. Money treated us as if we were things, and we died.»

Terry Pratchett


«Possession of the box conferred a kind of power on the wielder--which was that anyone, confronted with the hypnotic glass eye, would submissively obey the most peremptory orders about stance and expression.»

Terry Pratchett


«Progress just means bad things happen faster.»

Terry Pratchett


«Oh, he did his best to make their short lives miserable, because that was his job, but nothing he could think up was half as bad as the stuff they thought up themselves.»

Terry Pratchett


«The merest accident of microgeography had meant that the first man to hear the voice of Om, and who gave Om his view of humans, was a shepherd and not a goatherd. They have quite different ways of looking at the world, and the whole of history might have been different. For sheep are stupid, and have to be driven. But goats are intelligent, and need to be led.»

Terry Pratchett


«Where's the pleasure in bein' the winner if the loser ain't alive to know they've lost?»

Terry Pratchett


«WHO KNOWS WHAT EVIL LURKS IN THE HEART OF MEN?»

Terry Pratchett


«You Say To People 'Throw Off Your Chains' And They Make New Chains For Themselves?»

Terry Pratchett


«I'm just capable of entertaining the fantastic idea that, in certain circumstances,»

Terry Pratchett


«My personal theory is that he has a very firm grasp upon reality, it's simply not a reality the rest of us have ever met before.»

Terry Pratchett


«Adventure! People talked about the idea as if it were something worthwhile, rather than a mess of bad food, no sleep and strange people inexplicably trying to stick pointed objects in bits of you.»

Terry Pratchett


«Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.»

Terry Pratchett


«In theory it was, around now, Literature. Susan hated Literature. She'd much prefer to read a good book.»

Terry Pratchett


«Joy is to fun what the deep sea is to a puddle. It’s a feeling inside that can hardly be contained.»

Terry Pratchett


«Do you understand what I'm saying?"»

Terry Pratchett


«The only thing known to go faster than ordinary light is monarchy, according to the philosopher Ly Tin Wheedle. He reasoned like this: you can't have more than one king, and tradition demands that there is no gap between kings, so when a king dies the succession must therefore pass to the heir»

Terry Pratchett


«On the Disc, the Gods aren't so much worshipped, as they are blamed.»

Terry Pratchett


«He helped the Librarian up. There was a red glow in the ape's eyes. It had tried to steal his books. This was probably the best proof any wizard could require that the trolleys were brainless.»

Terry Pratchett


«She wore so much thick white makeup in order to conceal her naturally rosy complexion that if she turned around suddenly her face would probably end up on the back of her head.»

Terry Pratchett


«Belief, he says. Belief shifts. People start out believing in the god and end up believing in the structure.»

Terry Pratchett


«I just think the world ought to be more sort of organized.'»

Terry Pratchett